Anxiety and worry are common reactions for those who have survived traumatic experiences. It’s possible that relapsing into anxiousness is just a habitual fallback of which we’re not even conscious?
It stems from a lifetime of physical, emotional, or spiritual pain. The purpose of our brain is protection at any cost. This means a hard-wired thought pattern of potentially destructive or negative thinking.
Let’s face it. It’s often easier to be in doom and gloom than make the mental shifts necessary to get ourselves out of fight or flight. The constant inundation of bad news, social media outlets, and complaining doesn’t help.
This has now come back into focus, having planned a master class in New York City. As the day approached, anxiety became increasingly strong. Coupled with physical exhaustion, it’s like the defeat happened before it even began.
The first step is to capture the thinking process. If, like me, anxiety is your default, it’s important to remember that it’s NOT your fault. Like any habit, this one can also be changed with a little effort.
An actionable step: I had planned to have a rehearsal with my assistant to prepare for the choreography. My team sent out invitations, posts, and advertisements to generate more action. Taking action is our most effective defense against anxiety.
The question that often arises is: what is the underlying cause of our fear? Many individuals who have experienced multiple life-and-death traumas often develop a fear of death.
In the current situation, I had to step back and ask myself, where is this mindset coming from, and what purpose is it serving? A long-standing pattern of not feeling successful or being labeled the underdog’ was at play. I asked myself, “Self, what’s the worst that can really happen?”
The answer is that no one shows up to class, and I lose some money.
On the scale of life and death situations, is this so bad? The ultimate answer is NO.
Realizing that all the work had been done, it became easier to sit back and trust the outcome, no matter the result. So, what happened? My worst fear came true, and I did not die. We had no attendees.
Was I disappointed? Of course. But the time and effort were not wasted. With many dance-related projects in the mix, the meeting to prepare choreography and be back in a teaching mindset and preparation was important. It is a set-up for victory later.
A past response would have been a huge level of stress and mental breakdown. Yes, it is important to manage disappointment, but that doesn’t mean we are failures.
Let’s begin to reframe any potentially negative situation. Let’s have a positive and honest debrief on what we may perceive as something not working. What can we learn, and how can we redirect for a better outcome next time?
As for perceived lost financial investment, this is always an opportunity to eradicate the poverty mentality. There is more than enough money in the world, and there is always a way to create a fortune. If we are not willing to try new things, we will never be able to move forward and create abundance.
How can we learn from the situation? Rather than being angry or frustrated, let’s regroup and transform the outcome for next time.
Anxiety can be a habit or a springboard. If it is no longer creating value in our lives, then we can catch it in its tracks and try a new pattern. Like any habit change, it takes effort, but what successful life and emotional transformation doesn’t?
Take a break the next time your anxiety takes over. How critical is this? Is there truly a risk to my life? Can I take a step back, brush it aside, and continue to savor the day?
Be inspired by the mistakes. Give yourself a pat on the back for your work and move on. This is how we create victory in life.
YOU ARE WINNING!!