My mentor in life, global scholar Daisaku Ikeda writes:
To be fearless no matter what happens—that is the root of true happiness. To move forward resolutely regardless of what lies in store—that is the spirit, the resolve, that leads to human victory. —Daisaku Ikeda
As the world gets faster and instant gratification is the norm, the ongoing challenge is often to sit back and let things unfold on their own.
I don’t know about you, but patience has never been a virtue for me. Even before social media, I wanted instant results. This was due in part to fear. I was running out of time because I had diabetes, an incorrect message that took years to overcome.
It’s important to give people, work, art, relationships, and business endeavors time to blossom on their own. As a recovering codependent it is still difficult to sit back and trust the process. This is ultimately what it means to have faith. We also must trust ourselves and our actions. No matter the outcome every situation can be a source of growth if we choose to not stay in a victim mindset always blaming others for our woes.
This idea of focusing on the long-range goal has come up a lot lately with the end of 2021 and the start of 2022. Many things in life are seeming crazy and inexplicable right now. Let’s be real, it can be downright depressing.
In those low moments of sorrow and fear, it is important to step back take a breath and remember, this too shall pass. What simple actions can I take right now to feel better and keep moving forward? What is the focus of my conversations with friends? Am I rehashing all the things not going my way or am I remaining forward-focused?
This all takes work. I would imagine we all have pandemic burnout among a host of normal challenges. As we are fully into the final stretch of the year let’s just stay focused on the long-range view. A tree doesn’t grow to 100 feet tall in a week, a month a year, or a decade. It endures many literal weather storms and still comes out triumphant with a solid foundation.
I recently had to make some difficult decisions and take difficult actions. This happens in life. Rather than the second guess, I decided to trust both my life and my faith. It has also been another wonderful opportunity to not get caught up in other people’s reactions but stay grounded in the truth and truly trust the process.
Nobody wants to jump into the situation and try to ‘fix it’ more than I do. I have also learned in codependency recovery that setting boundaries while taking new and different types of actions is uncomfortable and probably means we are on the right path. Letting things work themselves out can seem scary but let’s reframe this notion.
Maybe, just maybe, the result, however long it takes, will be BETTER than we could have strategized? Maybe the patience to step back allows people time and space to reflect and do their own human revolution. At the end of the day, this is how we create victory in life, by facing all our obstacles and behaviors head-on and taking new actions to transform whatever the challenge is at hand.
Not knowing what will happen can be maddening. I get it. Forcing the solution or not trusting the process never ends well. Sometimes the best thing to do is simply nothing at all. Sometimes we need to be allowed to fall hard so we can build the strength of character to pull ourselves up. This is not a new concept. In the rooms of addiction recovery, it is often mentioned that people need to ‘hit bottom’ to acknowledge something is awry. This isn’t something anyone can do for us.
It happened to me in my early thirties and looking back I am so grateful. Was it hard? Yes. Facing our truth sets us free. If we lose people along the way, we must trust this as well. New relationships will form. New work opportunities will arise if we allow the time, space, and grace for this to happen.
With this my friends I say let’s trust the process and focus on the long-range goal. What actions are we taking today to create the results we want in the future? This includes being happy no matter what.
You are WINNING!